N.B This post was first published on this blog in October 2019.
So this would be a short one, I hope haha. It just came to me this morning to do and I wanna obey quickly before I start talking story
Ok recently, I let go of my domestic help like most of you know.
It coincided with a season at work when I am also working alone (I have new staff but they resume Nov 4)
It has been two weeks plus since we let her go and I still recall the JOY that filled my life the moment she walked out. Ironically, her name is GRACE but as she left, it felt like I became overwhelmed with Grace Haha.
Has it been tough?
Yes, but I would be quick to say not as tough as I thought. Over the weekend, my darling husband said ‘I dunno about you babe but it doesn’t feel like anything has changed since Grace left. It almost looks like nothing happened’
I wanted to tell him that it has everything to do with my wife and domestic wisdom but I smiled instead and agreed with him haha. God has really helped me mehn!!!
So this morning, after the kids left for school, I was cleaning up and thinking about how really God has helped me with my routines at home and all, and I felt to share
Now this is no formula… This should instead push you back to Jesus and have Him give you your own formula. The details differ but the principles remain the same… If you will be fruitful at home, walk/work with Jesus and work out routines and structures that guide your 24hour day. The wisdom He will give will not only be unique for your home, it will also work for it too.
A little about my home and season.
My kids sleep at 8pm and wake at 6am. They leave for school at 6.35 to 6.45 depending on when the bus comes so I have about 45mins to bathe, feed and dress them. You can imagine the marathon but I love for them to have 10hours sleep. Would prefer for them to sleep earlier but they have to wait for hubby so far he is home before or at 8pm
They don’t return till 2.45pm or 3pm, so it means that I have 7am to 3pm to work and do other things.
That is 8hours and it is a lot.
So how do I do it? First, I sleep between 9 and 10 and wake at 2am MOST DAYS. I pray, work, strategize, read, workout, and all that. Most days, almost 90% of that whole morning goes to my Jesus time. I am USELESS without it. By 5.30 I enter mommy mode and start to prep all they need. I pack lunch bags, set breakfast, and all their cloths before I wake them. Once I wake them, we can brush and eat before bathing or the opposite depending on how awake they are. Then dress them, we pray, take communion, anoint ourselves and then toward the Grace, my phone rings from the school bus.
Of course those morning routines happen real fast… For example, breakfast is always either oats and banana or Goldenmorn, something that can be eaten easily and without fight. I feed both cos I am usually in lightening mode haha.
Then once they leave for school, I take 30mins to arrange the house… make beds, clear kitchen and living room, sort laundry, then I bath and dress up. By 7.15 or 7.30, I am back at my work desk to finish up my Jesus time and pray. I also take my confessions then and anoint the home. By 8.30, I read for 30mins. I am currently reading Beginner’s Pluck and Deep work (again). By 9, I get on whatsapp and attend to my squads which takes like 2 hours to do the rounds. Phew. Intense!!!
By 11, I get into strategizing especially as that forms a major part of what my season looks like as work is going through a transition. I also take an hour minimum most days to gain knowledge on my field.
By 2, I jump up and be a mommy again… fly to the market at estate gate to top up on anything, get their water and lunch ready, and then wait for them. I have my freezer filled with all kinds of foods so cooking is very light.
It takes say 1hour to 1hr 30mins to get them finally done with bath, lunch and all. It is a crazy time I tell you. They are usually so high.
After that, I let them play and I start to work again. Told the school to not give me homework Tuesdays and Thursdays as I prefer for them to sleep instead. Wednesday and Friday the home piano teacher comes so that buys me time too and I can do further work.
By 6, we do homework if we didn’t do it earlier, then bath, eat and wait for daddy. From 6, I have wrapped up the bulk of my work so all I look for are short bursts of times to read, pray, eat and just relax with them.
Notice I missed out food before now. I follow the intermittent fasting guide and here, I don’t eat till 6pm. Food is the least of my problems and IF was made just for me.
I also tend to not wash any plates after the first one in the morning. No time so I keep lumping it. When I wake at 2 and I am praying, I tend to now wash plates too lol.
Hubby gets in and he handles the teeth brushing and putting them to bed after rough play lol.
Then it is now I and hubby time till I sleep. Some days hubby eats and some days nope. Either ways, I have his food in freezer only to heat it up. Except he wants something else which most likely will be easy to make like noodles, fried plantain and all. Or to make swallow cos I already have like three soups lol.
I try to find time to plan my next day at night but sometimes I don’t so I do that when I wake.
I also lump my washing so I do MOST of it weekends. They have just enough uniforms and socks for each day of the week so even if they can’t repeat, we are good. No time to be washing.
Cos the days get real intense, I take a day off to have very relaxed to no rules and that happens bang in the middle of the week for me and that is Thursdays. I go outside the home to work, I most times don’t really fast cos I have to buy food where I am to be able to stay there (and eatery) and I just read and do light work. I also catch up on sleep too. That Thursday brings a balance to my life. I can also catch up on relationships then.
Now let me share another major game changer that made me more effective.
I told my friends I was unavailable to talk or chat during the work hours except urgent so 90% of the time, I don’t social chat when I am to be working.
I actually have a message I sent to all my friends so they know. And we all respect it. I also don’t do personal calls and all. I save them all for after work hours. That makes me squeeze out all the juice from my hours. All these over gisting with friends won’t help anyone. Plus I lay down my personal whatsapp forever (or maybe till 2070 lol) so I have only my work whatsapp and we cannot just be gisting there. My iPhone which is my personal line actually has no whatsapp on it. Do you know how FREEING that is?
I actually have times and schedules when I catch up with some friends. In fact on my task board, I have a list of 10 friendships I must nurture so I make the time to catch up but no incessant chats during the day
Some of you need to just do this… Don’t worry, your real friends would understand and apply it too sef. All these I don’t have time it is because you are wasting precious time chatting or scrolling through social media. You notice I didn’t mention SM here cos I don’t even know when last I opened Facebook, twitter of IG. I only open the new social media which is my Bible App abeg so I know what devotionals and stuff my friends are using.
Let me end with a quote from Bob Goff…
My leadership mentor Craig Groeschel asked him in an interview…
How do you keep your productivity levels so high? And he replied ‘By keeping my distraction levels low’
I picked that and have NEVER forgotten it, I have been brutal in keeping distraction levels low abeg. And above all, my strength and wisdom comes straight from Jesus. I never compromise my time with Him.
So there you go. Let me know if you have any further questions and how this helped
I still owe a follow up to the Long distance marriage post and I will do it.
Lots of love, light and wisdom