You can live this great life that God wants you to live without having to constantly look to other people’s lives and compare your lot with theirs. Don’t be a voyeur, dear Queen. (This blogpost was first published in 2019.)
Hey GDQs
Super excited to blog today. I have been in a season of mentoring GDQs in my academy, and many other things that make me feel like I am blogging, but hey, we are here today.
Let me start with some good news…
Concerning mentoring, by 2020 we would have more regular sessions and stuff so if you didn’t get in the last time, chances are high that you will be in at some point next year. Plus there are other amazing stuff we have planned out for GDQs so stick around mama.
Oh and then, IG @stayhomemoms.ng is going down by December, and our YouTube channel would be going up and I would be sharing here on the blog. You should also join our mailing list by dropping your email on this blog post as we shoot out super amazing content on a regular to your inbox. Even the mentoring academy wasn’t put on the blog when the last call went out cos I really wanted to open up to just those on the mailing list to avoid being swamped with applications. So join the mailing list already.
Ok on to today’s gist…
Yesterday, as I did some house work at home, laundry in particular, I was listening to a sermon by Apostle Selman while also praying. By the time I was done, including spreading the cloths, sweeping the whole home and cleaning the kitchen, I had a clean environment, and a very alive spirit. It didn’t look like those 2 hours or so were wasted on house chores (I don’t have a help so it sure can get overwhelming).
Part of what I prayed about was WISDOM. I just kept on asking God to give me wisdom and strategies for running my own home. And, I say this with all sense of humility, God has REALLY helped me with wisdom. The way my home runs is really GRACE and WISDOM. Like, my home runs, my business which I run from home works, my life and relationships work, my motherhood ROCKS and best of all, my MARRIAGE WORKS!!!
Like, my husband came in the other day and was like ‘babe you really are the SUPER GLUE of this home. You hold everything together. You are MAMA SUPERGLUE’ lol. That really meant a lot to me. I only recently got staff at work so for a while it was ONLY ME doing it all.
Phew. God has REALLY helped me and as I was just LAVISH in thanking Him, I heard Him clearly say that ‘A lot of His children don’t ask Him for SPECIFIC wisdom to running their homes’
And I really got it when He said it. The terms that come to mind are VOYEURS, JEALOUS LOVER, and FIDELITY
A lot of us are VOYEURS, constantly looking at the lives of others and admiring it, or beefing it, while wondering why our own is not working. And this is the big deception of social media… It gives us access and makes us VOYEURS. I love an analogy I got from Brooke Ligertwood the other day I was watching an interview.
She said that a lot of us approach our relationship with God as tourists and because she lives in LA she can relate with that. There are a lot of Tourist buses that go around with tourists and their binoculars peering into celebs houses and all, so we too stay from afar peering into others business and stuff meanwhile Jesus is like MY OWN DOOR IS OPEN, come right in.
That’s the deal with VOYEURS. You forget that you can have YOUR OWN BEST LIFE once you leave that ministry and receive the invitation of Jesus.
I say JEALOUS LOVER because that is really who God is. I was reading the book of Ezekiel yesterday and in a certain chapter, He reminds Jerusalem that He is a jealous LOVER and so was going to PUNISH HER for being so disobedient and UNFAITHFUL by going after other lovers which He is CLEARLY BETTER THAN.
And that is where FIDELITY comes in. God is WORTHY of our FIDELITY. He doesn’t want any middle man or replacement. That is not to say we don’t need our mentors, pastors and teachers. Nope, I am HUGE on mentoring. I however KNOW that a lot of us are not using mentoring well.
Instead we have become VOYEURS. Mentoring is not that I copy you, mentoring is that I look at the patterns, principles and behind the scenes of a person’s life, then prayerfully go to God and ask Him for wisdom on how to apply what you have gleaned.
What works for X in her marriage and home may be a complete DISASTER in your home, but maybe she came to that conclusion having looked at a few underlying principles
For instance, in my home, it takes me an average of 27mins from WAKEEEEE UP to WE ARE READY FOR SCHOOL with my two kids. Part of what makes it work is that I give them a breakfast that they eat QUICKLY (meaning they like it) and I play SINACH and KADOSH KADOSH while they eat because they ADORE those songs and keep opening their mouth and swallowing fast as they watch them. We can get feeding done in 10mins as a result. So on school days, only two things make the menu
Oats and banana
Golden morn
You can now look at me and think this is the way, so you try to repeat this. Meanwhile your kids LOVE bread or plantain so they waste time with the cereal and you are wondering why. Then you put Sinach and realize everyone is distracted and you are slowed down.
You see, you took what you saw through VOYEURING literally and didn’t take it to your JEALOUS LOVER who is WORTHY OF YOUR FIDELITY (You worshipped another god by not passing it through Him) and then as a result, life is not working for you.
I used a really basic example but same works from the fundamental to the mundane.
Apply principles not action and these principles only make sense if we go to God for His own heavenly strategies specific to your home.
Trust me babes, if you do this, I PROMISE you, the home front would start to run so well over time that you sef will start looking like a star. And soon, even your hubby will notice and commend.
So let’s give up being VOYEURS; not of our friends, our social media community or even our mentors. Let us glean what we can, then go to God for wisdom and He will surely lavish you with the kind you need specifically for your home.
And then when He does, you must be DISCIPLINED enough to APPLY it consistently till you hit a flow that now makes you look like a star!!!
Cheers to rocking that home front like God’s Domestic Queen that you are
Lots of love
Eziaha