How my Domestic help started bonding with my kids.

Let me tell a quick story, Moms

But first, I have been BLOWN away by the responses to the call for mentoring.

There have been so many applications that I really could not afford to send again like I promised the new subscribers.

Please I am SO SORRY.

If you are not on our mailing list, join in here mama. I send out exclusive info ONLY to those on the list, and even though Q1 mentoring is closed,

(I will be sending out emails to those shortlisted by Wed, Feb 12.), we will open up again in Q2 and I hope you are on the mailing list then.

Please join in here. I am also working on sending child friendly recipes to moms on the list from time to time, and MORE.

Join the mailing list HERE

Ok so this blog MAY NOT BE for everyone NOW but maybe, later, it may resonate.

Feel free to forward it to a friend who MAY need it NOW as I sense it is a TIMELY WORD for someone.

I did a blog here on how I didn’t know I was dealing with fear when it came to my kids.

I recall I would just be thanking God that I am a FT Domestic Queen so I am here to protect them from as much human danger as I can, e.g. a help maltreating them and all.

It was a real fear which I didn’t even know, so I am thankful that the Lord shone His light on it and I could fight it.

So now, I KNOW that God has got my kids and we are navigating discipline and fighting fear together.

Frankly, to speak the truth, the fear battle is gone. Yesterday, I had a fire at home thanks to the FOOLISH NEPA official that came to install a new prepaid meter and messed with our connection. I am thankful I was home and could put it out, then trust satan to try to scare me with future occurrences of being away and my help not knowing what to do.

Instantly, the WORD I had received that God had promised me to care for my kids came back and the fear was gone before it had a seat.

So it is now discipline that we are navigating. I am reading DARE TO DISCIPLINE by James Dobson and speaking the word, and getting them to also speak over themselves. I am also showing GRACE because kids will be kids, but I don’t need them crossing the line into naughty.

Ok, so this post will sort of build on that so be sure to read that one here FIRST.

So, my kids were not talking to my help well.
I checked to see whether something about her was off in the spirit and I picked nothing.

In the natural, I thought she was doing her best really. I mean there was room for improvement but what she knew to do, she was doing.

I also checked to see whether I was not being in a hurry to allow for bonding and I wasn’t.

Then one day, I took a walk and on the walk, I felt the Lord telling me to start to intentionally BE UNAVAILABLE at certain times so they don’t have a choice.

My ALWAYS being available was making the bonding process longer.

For example, my kids wake at 7am and leave at 7.45am. Since it would take her longer to navigate bath and all alone, then I get her to wake them 15mins earlier, be sure school bag and lunches are packed, breakfast is set, then I disappear. I actually go lock myself in a room so when they wake, it is only her.

I have been doing that a few days and mehn, I have seen the effect.

I also do that some days when they get back. I lock myself somewhere and allow her do all they need to do together after they return, before I now come out.

Deliberately keeping myself away has allowed them bond more with her, and even now, I am seeing them hang around and play with her even when I am in view.

Gosh, how amazing is the Holy Spirit.
Truly, we parent with the LORD. We parent with the HOLY SPIRIT.

Moms need the HS.

That idea could have only come from above.
The funny thing is because they were always so clingy, it was eating into my work time.

Now, that action has freed up between 2 to 3 hours for me, then I can spend PRODUCTIVE and QUALITY time with them when it is time to do that. Not trying to multi task with these little humans shouting ‘Mummy I wanna wee-wee’

God is so good.

Dear GDQ, because we spend so much time with our kids and they see you all the time, it may take them time to bond with others, but mama, you need to do other things ALONE at different times of the day, and I really believe the HS will show you how you too can make yourself available so your kids can build and invest in other relationships and not become the absolute center of your world and vice-versa.

Your kids need you, yes, but they also need other healthy and godly relationships around them.

Just keep the antenna of your spirits up and if you don’t pick any negative signal, fight fear from satan, apply wisdom and allow your kids build a life that’s outside of you sometimes.

Then you can have more time to say YES to Jesus and everything else, He needs us to do, right at home.

When you live that kind of BALANCED life, you bring more JOY to your parenting and even being a wife.

Even though we love our kids, we could eat them, we still need time away from them, and they too need time away from us.

Cheers to being invisible if and when you need to be.

Grace and Strength
GDQ Eziaha

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